Never ask advice from someone who has something at stake or something to lose from your decision. The more objective the person is the greater value you should place on the input.
DAVID J. LIEBERMAN, Get Anyone to Do Anything
It's always good to be careful when you give advice, because someone might take it.
CROFT M. PENTZ, 1001 Things Your Mother Told You
Show me a wife who doesn't offer advice and I'll show you one who doesn't care very much.
BARBARA BUSH, attributed, Meditations for Women Who Do Too Much
One of the trickiest forms of bad advice is seemingly good advice that contradicts other seemingly good advice. Take for example "Know your limitations" and "Man's reach should exceed his grasp." Which is it? It can't be both, can it? No! But for years I have bounced between the frustration of having my reach exceed my grasp and the boredom of the certain knowledge of my limitations. Don't make the same mistake. When you encounter seemingly good advice that contradicts other seemingly good advice, ignore them both. "Turn the other cheek" cancels "An eye for an eye," leaving us free to render justice in accordance to whatever cockamamie principles we happen to come up with that morning.
AL FRANKEN, Oh, the Things I Know!
The reason why we often get poor advice is that it's hard to find a person who always has our best interest at heart, isn't envious in any way, and at no level thinks he knows what's best for you.
DAVID J. LIEBERMAN, Get Anyone to Do Anything
Advice is always the swan song of the passing generation, the quavering high treble of our experiences which we insist upon dedicating to those who come after us.
HENRY'S WIFE, The Independent, vol. 63
What's wrong with advice? Advice is often a basic insult to the intelligence of the other person. It implies a lack of confidence in the capacity of the person with the problem to understand and cope with his or her own difficulties. As Norman Kagan puts it, "In essence, we implicitly say to someone, 'You have been making a "big deal" out of a problem whose solution is immediately apparent to me--how stupid you are!'
ROBERT BOLTON, People Skills
There are as many forms of advice as there are colors of the rainbow. Remember that good advice can come from bad people and bad advice from good people. The important thing about advice is that it is simply that. Advice.
AL FRANKEN, Oh, the Things I Know!
Advice is like snow--the softer it falls, the deeper it goes.
CROFT M. PENTZ, 1001 Things Your Mother Told You
The business man who is constantly asking advice is advertising the fact of his uncertainty of his own actions. Your great problems must be decided by yourself.
WILLIAM CROSBIE HUNTER, Dollars and Sense
A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes.
JOSEPH ADDISON, The Spectator, Sep. 4, 1712
Advice is like cooking--you should try it before you feed it to others.
CROFT M. PENTZ, 1001 Things Your Mother Told You
Advice is more agreeable in the mouth than in the ear.
MASON COOLEY, City Aphorisms
Another problem with advice is that the advisor seldom understands the full implications of the problem. When people share their concerns with us, they often display only the "tip of the iceberg." The advisor is unaware of the complexities, feelings, and the many other factors that lie hidden beneath the surface.
ROBERT BOLTON, People Skills
We give advice by the bucket, but take it by the grain.
WILLIAM ALGER, attributed, Treasury of Thought
It is easy enough to advise a drunkard not to drink, but difficult for you to understand his view point on the subject if you are not a drinking man yourself.
WILLIAM CROSBIE HUNTER, Dollars and Sense
The trouble with good advice is that it usually interferes with our plans.
CROFT M. PENTZ, 1001 Things Your Mother Told You
Advice is only rarely requested with the intention of being followed. Sometimes, it is requested in order to flatter the advisor. Sometimes, it is requested because it is hoped that the advice given will tell a great deal about the advisor. Sometimes, the request is an excuse for spending time with the advisor, because his or her room is nicer.... Occasionally, the request for advice is an introductory sentence, a polite preface to a lengthy statement of the requester's opinion. Asking for advice can also be a way of apologizing for numerous occasions when advice or orders have not been followed in the past.
NORMAN SARTORIUS, Fighting for Mental Health
Asking for advice is an act of humility.... The act alone says, "I need you." The decision maker and the adviser are pushed into a closer relationship.
DENNIS BAKKE, Joy at Work
Good advice offering requires knowing a person very, very well. So well, in fact, that you may know more about them than they know about themselves in certain situations. Then, good advice is loving and given out of love. It is never to control or manipulate. Then, it is giving information; just giving, not enforcing, information. And lastly and most importantly, after advice is given, the outcome is let go of completely, trusting that the other person will take it, leave it, or ponder it.
ANNE WILSON SCHAEF, Meditations for Women Who Do Too Much
I always pass on good advice. It is the only thing to do with it. It is never of any use to oneself.
OSCAR WILDE, An Ideal Husband
Advice is not often asked of seeming idlers: it is most common to interrupt the busy by such requests; and naturally enough, since those who attend most carefully to their own concerns, are generally thought best qualified, by experience, to judge for others.
Southern Literary Messenger, vol. 4
Advice is like mushrooms. The wrong kind can prove fatal.
E. C. MCKENZIE, Mac's Giant Book of Quips & Quotes
If you listen too much to advice, you may wind up making other people's mistakes.
CROFT M. PENTZ, 1001 Things Your Mother Told You
To offer a man unsolicited advice is to presume that he doesn't know what to do or that he can't do it on his own.
JOHN GRAY, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus
The desire to give advice is itself a symptom of disapproval; and further, it is usually the result of a desire to express that disapproval. And we are most moved to give advice to those for whom our affection and regard may be taken for granted, but to whom we would rather express our disapproval. We cannot go to them and say that we disapprove of them. That would not be affectionate, and might lead to reprisals. But we can give them advice in which the disapproval is implied and which yet seems innocently helpful.
JOHN WILLIAM MACKAIL, "On Giving Advice"
It's a great thing to get advice from a man who knows, but it's an unfortunate thing to get advice when he doesn't know.
GEORGE H. KNOX, Ready Money
Before you give advice, that is to say advice which you have not been asked to give, it is well to put to yourself two questions--namely, what is your motive for giving it, and what is it likely to be worth? If these questions were always asked, and honestly answered, there would be less advice given.
JOHN WILLIAM MACKAIL, "On Giving Advice"
Free advice is often overpriced.
E. C. MCKENZIE, Mac's Giant Book of Quips & Quotes
